Planet Succubus - Chapter 6

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Helios Leinheart
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Planet Succubus - Chapter 6

Post by Helios Leinheart »

Warning - This is a horror story with sexual content

The age of man is at an end. The time of the succubus has come.

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Chapter 1 - Two Years, Fifty Three Days, and Nine Hours
http://heliosleinheart.pbworks.com/w/pa ... hapter%201
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Chapter 2 - The Demons of Desire
http://heliosleinheart.pbworks.com/w/pa ... hapter%202
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Chapter 3 - The Savior's Contract
http://heliosleinheart.pbworks.com/w/pa ... hapter%203
---
Chapter 4 - Arkasia
http://heliosleinheart.pbworks.com/w/pa ... hapter%204
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Silly587
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Re: Planet Succubus

Post by Silly587 »

Looks nice. It's gonna take a while to read all of this, so I'm just gonna pull up a chair and read for a while.

Keep being awesome, man.
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by Helios Leinheart »

Whew. Just finished. I would like to remind everybody that what you guys get is the first draft. I've edited here and there as I've read over bits, but for the most part, it's just a first draft.

Don't let that stop you from posting reviews and critiques. Just know that this isn't the perfected product. Please enjoy. Make sure to let me know if this was frightening at all. I've been angry lately, so I fear I may have gone too far.

Please enjoy. You'll find it right up there^ in the first post.
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by Hood »

Ah! Finally, the fourth chapter...
I had two teories about how succubi invaded thye world...
First one was...The army (as alwways)...
Or someone who did it because he had a reason too...
(Helios...it seems you have watched Viper Gts; the scene of that guy cursing everything and everyone seemed too familiar to me)...
At least, I´m glad that in some way, the Succubi queen respects his master...
I loved the part of "Your human part wants me to stop but your demonic blood desires it...
Will we see more of that young man later? or the story focuses on Marik only...?


Wonder if a mother and child were able to perform that same pact/contract...
In order to save her child...

You are doing an outstanding Job, Helios...
Can´t believe its a draft
There are those who would scorn good-natured people. Even if God himself will
not show his face, a heartful person will one day take God's place in
visiting Judgement upon them. This is what is known as "Divine Retribution"
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by Helios Leinheart »

Hood wrote: You are doing an outstanding Job, Helios...
Can´t believe its a draft
Oh trust me, it needs work. Lots and lots of it.

And why does everybody assume I've seen Viper GTS? I swear everybody! I haven't seen it! Yet!

And yes, I fully intend for Thomas (or Themias, whichever part of him you prefer) to reappear. Possibly numerous times. There's a slight chance that this story will pull a FF8 at certain points. Anybody that has played the game will know exactly what I mean.
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by Hood »

Helios Leinheart wrote:
Hood wrote: And why does everybody assume I've seen Viper GTS? I swear everybody! I haven't seen it! Yet!
Because the scene where thomas summnoed Arkasia is sligthly similiar to that when Carrera is summoned
(Angry-with-everybody dude summoning succubus)
There are those who would scorn good-natured people. Even if God himself will
not show his face, a heartful person will one day take God's place in
visiting Judgement upon them. This is what is known as "Divine Retribution"
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by DogKama »

and it takes one guy to fuck things up for the rest of us uh? ;) Glad to see your continuing the story Helios. Keep it up!
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by Helios Leinheart »

I'm a bit surprised Dog. I didn't think you would be into erotic horror.

I gotta ask, how was the horror? I was going less for erotica and more for a sinister experience in this chapter.
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by DogKama »

well I like different.. plus I have manyeyedhydra's book, a succubus for Christmas^^
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 4

Post by Helios Leinheart »

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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 5

Post by Helios Leinheart »

Chapter 6 is up. Not sure why I'm posting it though.

http://heliosleinheart.pbworks.com/w/pa ... hapter%206
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 5

Post by Hood »

Helios Leinheart wrote:Not sure why I'm posting it though.
Why?
There are those who would scorn good-natured people. Even if God himself will
not show his face, a heartful person will one day take God's place in
visiting Judgement upon them. This is what is known as "Divine Retribution"
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 5

Post by Helios Leinheart »

Hood wrote:
Helios Leinheart wrote:Not sure why I'm posting it though.
Why?
I have no idea if anybody here is interested in reading it anymore. You may notice the lack of words between chapters 5 and 6.
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 6

Post by Hood »

Well, I'm reading it and I like it, it's just that maybe, we are not as numerous yet. Just be patient, man ;)
I have been dealing with some real life stuff, and I have not been able to post anything.
There are those who would scorn good-natured people. Even if God himself will
not show his face, a heartful person will one day take God's place in
visiting Judgement upon them. This is what is known as "Divine Retribution"
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Helios Leinheart
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 6

Post by Helios Leinheart »

Hood wrote:Well, I'm reading it and I like it, it's just that maybe, we are not as numerous yet. Just be patient, man ;)
I have been dealing with some real life stuff, and I have not been able to post anything.
I'm not singling out anybody.
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Re: Planet Succubus - Chapter 6

Post by PAZ »

People here is surely interested, just they rarely get online.
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