Then let me ask you this oh misguided youth. What would you do if you were walking home from the nearest city carrying medicine for a member of your family and you come across an Orc or a Queen Slime. I’ll tell you what you would do. You would become their plaything while your precious one continues to suffer from illness.
I’m Helios, and I’m here to teach and train you in the ways of Mamono and how to avoid, negotiate, and even fight them at their own game.
Mamono are a strange gift to humanity. All they want is the embrace of a man (sometimes a woman), and they will go to impressive lengths to get what they want. Some can become your loving and passionate wife. Some are only interested in a quick round of sex. But a majority of the species will keep you if given the chance.
Now, if being treated like a sex toy for the rest of your life sounds like a good idea, stop reading this, step outside, and run towards the nearest Orc camp or Alraune forest. Just one question, can I have your CD player?
But if you want to learn the science behind Mamono and tips on how to avoid them, stick around. You’re about to read interesting facts, escape and defense methods, how to talk to them, and stories from those that have encountered them personally.
Please enjoy “The Mamono Survival Guide”
Note: I'll add the actual profiles for convenience, but the longer ones will cut off. Just right click them and open the image in a new tab to see the full image.
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Nightmare
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Nightmare
Isn’t the dream world great? You can do anything you want and not have to worry about any repercussions. Hell, you can run through the streets of London stark naked screaming “HEIL HITLER!” if you’d like.
Note: That’s fucked up. Don’t do that.
But say your freedom in dreams was stripped. You wouldn’t like that now would you? To knowledge, there are only two Mamono with the power to enter your mind and take control of your dreams, the Succubus and the much more common Nightmare.
In the waking world, a Nightmare is a timid Centaur type Mamono that is rarely seen. They are shy and awkward whenever a man’s eyes are upon them, making them one of the most non-threatening Mamono.
That is until one manages to enter your dreams. That’s when you immediately become her bitch for the remainder of your good night’s rest. It is unknown how Nightmares choose their victims, but some researchers believe that men harbor thousands of different soul types, much like blood types, that draw the Nightmare to them.
Defending yourself from a Nightmare isn’t as simple as locking your doors, barring the windows, and keeping an armed guard around the perimeter of your home. These dream eaters use a form of dark temporal magic to enter your home and conduct their work. Once inside, the Nightmare then uses the same dark magic and performs a sort of temporary soul transfer to enter your dreams.
Note: There has been one reported occasion when due to a freak accident, a Nightmare was killed while conducting a dream invasion. Her heart stopped beating while her soul remained in the man’s body. Hence it stayed there for the rest of his life. Sharing his body and manifesting in his dreams every night. The two eventually became close and the gentleman actually asked a priest to marry the two souls in one body. One of the marriage witnesses was reported saying “Why isn’t the priest waiting? The bride isn’t here yet.”
While outside of your mind, a Nightmare is weak and almost powerless. But once she has injected her soul into you, the tables turn drastically. In order to weaken your mind and make it more susceptible to her intentions, she will put the man through a series of frightening dreams. This usually manifests as a dream of running in place from a monster, falling down an endless hole, or being showed a previous unpleasant memory. This is how the term “Nightmare” became synonymous with “a frightening dream.”
After your mind has been weakened, the Nightmare will then sexually assault you in both the dream world, and the waking world. As her dream self, which takes the form most pleasing to the male, makes love to you, the Nightmare will gently and carefully slip your penis into her mouth.
This act is not for pleasuring the male, but for collecting his semen and spirit energy when his dream self becomes pleasured to the point of inducing a real life orgasm.
70% of the time, people cannot remember their dreams. But if you wake up and find your penis is flaccid and lying on the sheets like a milked snake, you either have a very hardcore stalker or a Nightmare problem, which is the same thing really.
There are a number of methods you can use to protect yourself from a Nightmare.
Note: Dreamcatchers don’t work on Nightmares, but they do make great decorations.
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1: Feign sleep
You have a fifty fifty chance of capturing a Nightmare by pretending to be asleep. When using this method, all you have to do is startle the Nightmare with the classic “BLARG” before she injects her soul into you.
Note: Simply opening your eyes is all it takes to surprise her. No need to scare the poor beast senseless.
Nightmares become as docile as a newborn kitten as long as you keep your eyes on her. But she will most definitely make an escape the moment you let your gaze wander.
Note: Some Nightmares are highly experienced and can tell when a man is faking sleep by their breathing and heart rate. These Nightmares, just like the most tenacious mouse, require more finesse to deal with.
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2: Beep Beep Beep
Set your alarm clock to around 5 minutes after entering REM sleep. There is a bit of science involved here since everybody falls asleep at different rates. Consult a sleep specialist and undergo some tests to get an accurate time to set your alarm.
By setting your alarm, the Nightmare will become startled by the noise and wake you up in the process, giving you an opportunity to make eye contact with her, rendering her helpless.
Note: It’s very rare, but there are some Nightmares that even know how to operate and alarm clock and disable it. For these dream eaters, there is one last method that requires some practice before you can employ it.
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3: Ohhhhhhmmmmmm
Meditation. That’s right. Learn how to strengthen your mind and you will be able to face a Nightmare on your terms, not hers. Here’s how it works.
During deep sleep, the brain becomes weak and vulnerable, going into a sort of standby mode. These minds are like gaping windows for a Nightmare to crawl through. But a mind that has been trained through meditation can resist the probing of a dream eater.
With a strong mind, you can either block out a Nightmare completely, or you can let her in and really have some fun. The invader will quickly realize that she just entered the wrong mind when you start putting her through some nightmares of her own. After one night of being toyed with by the man she intended to feed upon, you can bet she won’t come aknockin on your dream door again.
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Nightmares rates low on the danger scale. They aren’t out to find a man and drag him back to their lair, they just have a very unique way of feeding that suits their timid personalities perfectly. However, they tend to feed on the same man many times before moving on to one with a different flavor. The frightening dreams they induce can become annoying, but the intercourse that follows can be oh so good.
It all depends on whether you mind being taken advantage of or not. If you do mind, use what you have just learned and your Nightmare will soon be gone.
Ghoul
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Ghoul
Do you like lollipops? To a Ghoul, that’s exactly what you are. A tasty flesh colored treat that just requires a little licking to reach the milky center.
Sound disturbing? In a way it is, but Ghouls just have an oral fixation that basically makes their mouth their primary sex organ.
Note: Ghouls always desire something to put in their mouth, but strangely this only seems to apply to human body parts. For example, offering an Oreo to a Ghoul will yield no effect. Blasphemy!
This undead type Mamono likes to stalk her prey in old cemeteries and dark forests. They are a nocturnal Mamono and have a slight aversion to bright lights. It’s not always guaranteed to work, but sometimes flashing a light at a Ghoul is enough to send it on its way.
Note: Reports state that once a man attempted to ward off a Ghoul with a 900 lumen flashlight. Unfortunately, not only did it have no effect on the Ghoul, but it also alerted 3 others to his presence. Words could not describe the amount of saliva that coated his body after he was rescued by forest rangers many hour later, but he was in good spirits nonetheless.
Unlike Zombies, Ghouls are stealthy and can sneak up on their prey. Once she reaches striking distance, her method of subduing a man is to grab him by the face and pull him into a vigorous kiss. The mouth of a Ghoul releases chemicals that mix with saliva, turning it into a chemical cocktail that you’ll find hard to resist.
As her tongue entwines with yours, your body will become extremely sensitive to touch and your testicles will go into overdrive, creating copious amounts of semen for the Ghoul to feed upon.
Fear not though, for all is not lost. Here are a few ways to defend yourself in, or from, a Ghoul attack.
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1: Bright Light
As mentioned earlier, shining a bright light in a Ghoul’s eyes will sometimes deter her. But as was also noted, most of the time it doesn’t work. There’s also the risk of attracting more Ghouls or even other Mamono to your location. Imagine a Ghoul, Arachne, Zombie, and Slime fuck fest. Now that’s one mess I wouldn’t wanna clean up.
This method should rarely be considered due to the high risk factor, however the next method has a much higher rate of success.
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2: Oh my word! Don’t stop!!!
All it takes is the gentle probing of your finger into her vagina to paralyze a Ghoul, giving you an opportunity to escape. This is because Ghouls tend to always use their mouth instead of their vagina, making them extremely sensitive down there.
This is a double edged sword however, for when she regains motor control, she will pursue you with astounding determination. After feeling you within her vagina, she will long for you and will likely never stop chasing you as long as she can still track you. Only resort to this method if you are confident that you can escape and shake her off your trail.
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3: Run like hell!
When all else fails, get the hell outta dodge. Because Ghouls are stealthy, you will need to keep a sharp eye out in order to spot one before she can get you into her lip lock. Remain vigilant, listen for rustling, check behind gravestones, keep an eye out if you stop to piss, and you may be able to catch your stalker in time to make a hasty getaway.
Note: One man received the surprise of his life when he stopped to pee on a particularly wide tree. As he drained his lizard, he was blissfully unaware of the Ghoul that was hiding just on the other side of the tree. Before he could say “blowjob”, the Ghoul reached around the tree and quickly locked her mouth around his penis. Thankfully he managed to finish his call to nature before enduring a long night together with the Ghoul.
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Ghouls rate high on the danger scale. This is due to their varying dispositions and tendencies. While one Ghoul will feed merely until she is sated, another will continue on for many hours after. One Ghoul may follow you around as your girlfriend while another will try to keep you for herself, using her saliva to keep you under her spell. Use caution regardless and remember what you’ve just learned to ensure your freedom.
“She lick me like a lollipop.”
Sorry, just had to get that outta my system.
Alraune
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Alraune
Is there anything more gentle and nonthreatening than an innocent little flower? At first glance you might assume an Alraune to be the same, but as you feel vines begin to coil around your limbs and pull you towards her and you see her lick her lips, leaving behind a golden trail of sticky nectar upon them to glue your mouth to hers, you’ll realize she’s not as innocent as you thought.
Alraune are what I like to refer to as the “angler fish” of the forest. They lure men to them with their sweet scent, and pounce when their prey draws close enough to reach with their vines. Despite her beautiful and gentle visage, an Alraune is one of the most dangerous Mamono you can encounter in the woods.
If she manages to pull you into her pod and lock lips with you, your fate then rests entirely in her hands. You may get lucky and be released after a simple feeding session, or she may grow fond of you and decide to keep you forever. As said in the encyclopedia entry, this is referred to as “taming the Alraune”
If this happens, you will be quite literally screwed. Constantly. I don’t know about you, but I find that possibility terrifying, and a little arousing…
But my sexual fantasies aside, here are some ways to keep yourself from becoming a human bag of Miracle Grow. Just remember that isn’t much you can do if she gets you into her pod. Arm yourself with knowledge to prevent that from happening.
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1: Know your odor
The human brain can be very dumb sometimes. When an unknown appealing scent enters your nose, the brain subconsciously suggests that you follow it. This urge is sometimes mitigated by having a destination to reach , but more often than not the scent of an Alraune will be like a hook that drags you towards her.
If you have never experienced this sweet smell, then you simply can’t understand how intoxicating it is. Scientists say it’s because Alraune nectar has addictive properties that carry over in the odor it gives off.
I can’t in good confidence tell you that a strong will is all it takes to resist the urge to seek out an Alraune because that kind of will is very rare to find in a human being. I can however inform you that Vicks Vapor Rub is excellent for overpowering the smell of nectar, and for clearing your sinuses. Just take a generous amount and rub it both under your nose and around your mouth.
If you don’t have a jar handy, any equally strong odor will do. Some other items you can use are garlic, peanut butter, fish, and in extreme cases of dire need, fecal matter. Hey, it beats getting raped for a lifetime doesn’t it?
Note: There’s one small downfall in using fish to overpower an Alraune scent, as one man learned when he went to the extreme and hung an entire day’s catch around his shoulders. He had been fishing at a secluded lake in a forest well known for its high Alraune population. As he hiked home with the smell of fish wafting off his body and filling his nostrils, he was unaware of the startling amount of Mamono his catch was attracting. Before he could make it halfway home, he was dog piled by a writhing mass of furry Werecats. Once they had devoured the fish, the showed their affection for the man by gang raping him, purring loudly all the while. From that day forward, he would have an escort of Werecats following him whenever he entered the forest.
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2: Slice and Dice
I’m not a big fan of Mamono cruelty, which is why I will never suggest a method defense that would harm the creatures. However, keeping a large knife or machete handy just in case you end up in an Alraune's vines is perfectly acceptable.
The vines of an Alraune feel no pain and grow back within a few hours. So with a few skilled slices, you can cut yourself free of her vines and make your escape.
Note: One man used this very method and easily managed to free himself from an Alraune grip. He made one crucial error though by turning around before he could disappear back into the trees. His heart melted when he saw the poor creature. She was reaching out to him with both arms and was crying golden tears of nectar. Given enough time, the man probably would have been able to deduce that his freedom was more important than drying a plant’s tears, but he never got the chance to reach that conclusion. His one moment of weakness was all the plant girl needed to snake some vines around his wrist and jerk the machete out of his hand. The Alraune became considerably happier as she dragged her struggling prey into her pod and silenced his screams for help by gluing her nectar covered lips to his. To this day you can find the two enveloped by the Alraune’s petals, twisting and turning in the throes of endless passion.
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3: EEEEEEEEK!!!
It’s not exactly a means of defense, but it is worth noting that Alraune have an intense fear of bugs. It is a well-known fact that lots of insects eat plants, and while Alraune do have hands to pluck them from their leaves, they still harbor a primal fear of insects. If you are lucky enough to have a stray caterpillar on your clothes, just dangle it in front of her face and she’ll drop you faster than a burning coal.
She will then retract into her pod and stay there until she can work up the guts to come back out. You are then free to leave at your leisure. Help yourself to a cup of her nectar if you wish. You deserve it for being so lucky.
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Alraunes rate extremely high on the Mamono danger scale. They have an extremely effective method of attracting prey and are almost impossible to escape from once you taste their lips. But now that you have learned about the species, you should be able to evade them whenever you feel like going on a nature walk.
Flower power has a name, and it is Alraune
Weresheep
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Weresheep
What do skilled hypnotists, warm milk, and Weresheep all have in common? They all make you verrrry sleeeepy. Anybody that has spent some time with a Weresheep will tell you that there’s nothing more effective at putting your lights out than this gentle Mamono.
Take note readers that this entry focuses specifically on wild Weresheep. Domesticated or liberated (a term I like to use for Mamono that are married or have a boyfriend) Weresheep are harmless and offer little to be concerned about.
You might be wondering how wild Weresheep differ from tame ones. Simple, tame Weresheep respect the wishes of their owner/boyfriend/husband, and if they ever do lose control and sexually assault you, it’s usually done in a safe place away from the eyes of wild Mamono.
Not so in the case of wild Weresheep encounters. If you are not informed and get suckered in by the Weresheep’s peaceful and loving gaze, you are at risk of being found by a passing Mamono when you eventually fall asleep due to the Weresheep’s fleece. It’s not really the Weresheep herself that’s dangerous. It’s the series of unfortunate events that can occur after being put to sleep by one.
Note: One man can attest to this more than anybody. When he encountered a Weresheep on the grassy fields just outside of his farm, he decided to take a rest and have some fun with the creature. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but he should have picked a safer place to do it. When he awoke well past sundown, the Weresheep was gone and a Red-Oni had taken her place. The man was tied up and carried to the Red-Oni’s village, where he was declared a party favor. A party favor with a penis.
There is only one simple way to prevent this kind of scenario from happening to you, and that is to just walk away. Don’t let yourself be tempted by a wild Weresheep, and if you absolutely must have her, lead her to your home. Weresheep are the easiest breed of Mamono to tame, as long as you don’t mind literally sleeping with her all the time.
Note: For reasons that have not yet been confirmed by scientists, Nightmares never approach a man sleeping with a Weresheep at his side. One speculation is that the sleep magic in a Weresheep’s fleece wards off Nightmares. Another is that when to souls actually join together when sleeping in such close proximity to each other, creating a much stronger mind that a Nightmare would have a difficult time manipulating. Chalk Weresheep up as another defense against Nightmares.
I won’t bother warning you about sheered Weresheep because anybody willing to do so is already well aware of the risks. Needless to say, Weresheep rate very low on the Mamono danger scale. They are slow, friendly, and easy to overpower. The only thing that can cause your demise concerning these gentle Mamono is sheer foolishness.
Succubus
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Succubus
Giving men everywhere a serious inferiority complex, it’s the succubus. A sex machine with demonic powers and a body that would make even the most gifted supermodels flush red with envy. Strong men become weak in the knees from her gaze. Men with power bow down in reverence to her glorious visage. And smart men turn into babbling idiots the moment they feel those soft lips against their own. Essentially, the succubus is the one universal weakness of all men on the planet, along with a meat lover’s pizza.
So with such a reputation for being the ultimate seducer of men, what can you possibly do when one sets her sights on you? The answer is “not a whole lot” I’m afraid. 95% of all men that meet a succubus wind up locked in an eternity of love making within her special chamber. The other 5% should either thank their lucky stars for escaping their embrace, or curse themselves for not returning it. After all, an eternity of love making sounds like a pretty sweet deal.
But you are obviously one of the men that would prefer not to be trapped in sexual limbo or you would not be reading this. Lucky for you, because through extensive research and extremely risky field testing that I won’t get into, I have devised a number of ways to defend against these demons of desire. Be warned, these methods are not guaranteed to work for you.
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1: This will only sting for a second
Have you ever seen the movie “The Rock” when Nicolas Cage stabbed himself in the heart with an adrenaline needle to save his life? Great scene I gotta say, and also very informative. If adrenaline can save you from a deadly nerve gas, perhaps it can defend from a succubus. Allow me to explain.
Every succubus released a natural pheromone from her wings that drives men crazy with lust. The effect varies in intensity based on the amount and how long you are exposed to it. It is damn near irresistible to men and is their best tool in the art of seduction.
Note: Sometimes a succubus chooses to live among humans under the guise of a normal human girl. It is not uncommon for them to sell love potions and perfumes created from their own pheromones to make a living. Needless to say, these potions and perfumes are extremely effective and fetch a very high price.
I have learned that injecting yourself with pure adrenaline will wipe the effect of the pheromone from your system for a short time, with the added bonus of giving you a huge burst of strength that will help you flee that much quicker. I wouldn’t recommend injecting it directly into your heart though. The thigh or butt will do just fine.
Note: One scientist conducted an experiment in the field to discover what effect adrenaline would have when injected into a succubus. He encountered one after searching in an abandoned cathedral and injected a needle filled with the substance into her rump while she was busy sucking on his neck. Two things were learned from this experiment. One, all succubi are masochists. Two, adrenaline has the opposite effect on a succubus. It was quite amusing to witness the demon lusting after a man instead of the other way around. The scientist fled valiantly, but is wasn’t long until he was caught, pinned, and raped repeatedly until the succubus returned to her senses and him away to her private chamber.
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2: Clang clang
The chastity belt is an old tool used in medieval times to protect a young maiden’s virginity. They were crafted from steel and most often had a heavy duty lock fixed to it. Buying a vintage model today would be unreasonable due to the high price. Plus they weren’t exactly popular items for men back in the day. However, you may be able to hire a craftsman to fabricate a male model for you. Hopefully with no questions asked…
Note: A well-made chastity belt can stymie even the most experienced succubus. That is until you encounter one that happens to know how to operate a blow torch and a jack hammer. Should you be so unfortunate, I recommend running like your goods depend on it, because they do.
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3: A most dangerous method
Every succubus is different. They all have varying dispositions and personalities, which is why this method can be very risky.
Before she can engage in sexual intercourse with you, grab her tail and give it a sharp yank upwards. There’s nothing a succubus hates worse than this. It is akin to receiving an especially painful wedgy.
While one succubus will back off and appear hurt, another will simply pin your arms down and rape you with intense vigor. If you have nothing else to lose, then you might as well give this method a try.
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The succubus rates in the highest ranks of dangerous mamono. Men become putty in the hands of a skilled succubus and are just as weak when encountering an inexperienced one. It is possible that some succubi simply cannot be reckoned with. For these types, you would be better off just taking off your pants and submitting. She’ll inevitably just take it in the end anyway.
If you do manage to escape a succubus, give yourself some credit for managing to avoid one of the most powerful and seductive mamono in existence. Help yourself to a meat lover’s pizza. You deserve it.
Beelzebub - Entry by: FlashGrenade0
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
Entry by: FlashGrenade0
Edited by: Helios Leinheart
Beelzebub
Hello there slobs of all ages. There’s nothing more peaceful than a relaxing nap near your own personal pile of filth, am I right? We all have a varying degree of messy rooms that, most of the time, we intentionally decide not to clean because we’ve already gotten used to the sight and can’t imagine it being any other way. Well, wake you up slobs! Otherwise you will be in for quite a rude awakening yourselves!
The Beelzebub is a selfish and voracious little bugger that has a particular taste for areas where filth is greatest. They eat practically anything they can get their admittedly strong little claws on, and they have a tendency to be quite insatiable. In terms of both hunger and lust. Of course, if you don’t mind being the potential target a monster girl that values filthiness above all else, including your bodily fluids, then by all means slob away.
Note: A past experience from a suitably traumatized young man explains this in greater detail. As he was relaxing in his pigsty of a room, he couldn’t help but notice a particularly large fly from the corner of his eye, appearing to be scarfing down some pizza he left in an open pizza box overnight. Needless to say, he immediately regretted confronting it about the pizza, because it then proceeded to turn around and rape him on the spot. After countless hours of the aforementioned assault, the Beelzebub took as much of the leftover food it could carry and fled the scene. The interviewers distinctly regarded him saying that he made every effort to keep his area of the house spotless afterward.
Beelzebubs are also known for their violent tendencies when it comes to the subtle yet passionate art of copulation. They crave it all the time and will take it if they must. Struggling is unwise, since doing so will only entice their actions further. Some of the more morbid ones actually prefer that you wriggle about helplessly while they receive their satisfaction.
Note: Though you may feel compelled to flee at the mere sight of a Beelzebub, if one notices you then your chances of escape become slim. Beelzebubs are astonishingly fast fliers and love the thrill of the chase. You may believe you are evading her, but in truth she is actually just toying with you until she grows bored. At that point she will most likely latch onto you like a june bug and not let go until she gets the satisfaction she seeks.
Beelzebubs are tenacious when it comes to getting what they want. They don’t like to give up when fighting over a food source and they don’t prefer to take it easy when riding a male as well. Applying one or some of these steps may give one a greater edge in escaping, or in some cases, alleviate the threat entirely.
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1: Danny, clean up your room this instant!
Simply stated, having a wondrously clean abode is the very bane of a Beelzebub’s existence. They like to be around dirty areas, so they actively avoid any area that is too clean for their tastes. Simply keeping your living space clean is a flawless method of warding off a Beelzebub.
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2: Ugh! That’s disgusting!
Most, if not all Beelzebubs have an immensely high sensitivity to smell. This particular trait makes itself known in their obsession with rotten and expired food.
Although most people that have a right state of mind wouldn’t try this method unless necessary, others may take this strategy in stride. If you have an expired food item(s) that is particularly fetid and rank beyond all comprehension, revealing it to an advancing Beelzebub will act as a scape goat. She will most likely show a higher interest in the food rather than in you based on the rate of decay.
By this time, you should make a break for it while you can. Beelzebubs do stand by after finishing to revel the taste for a minute or so, but they quickly snap out of their stupor, wanting more of it. It is suggested that this method only be used when you have a planned route of escape when the item is taken.
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3: Sweaty Human Shields
Although you will probably be regarded as a pariah by the time the events finish themselves out, this method has a very high chance of succeeding.
Beelzebubs love the smell of rotting food, but they like the smell of sweat just as well. If you are being pursued by a Beelzebub and have miraculously not been caught yet, leading it onto a field of humans playing a sport of some sort will more than likely cause your pursuer to lose focus on you. The overpowering scent of perspiration will no doubt give you more than enough time to vacate the area while the Beelzebub takes its pick of sweaty victims.
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Beelzebubs rate quite high on the danger scale due to their tenacity and selfish dispositions. They instinctively find and take anything that can sate their hunger and could care less about any protests whatsoever. If you’re one of those people that don’t favor baths, you can expect an encounter with this mamono very soon. If you take these strategies to heart however, you’ll never have to grow an immense phobia of flies.
Remember this and quake in fear slobs, for the flies are coming for you…….
Yuki-Onna
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Yuki-Onna
If Jack Frost has a mistress, she would most certainly have to be the lovely Yuki-Onna. You are safe from her as long as you don't venture up her mountain, but once you do, you have entered her world. The snow is her eyes and it is always watching for a warm body to bring home.
Yuki-Onna do not hunger for spiritual energy like many other mamono. Instead they crave the warmth of a human body. Not for the purposes of cuddling, but to raise their own body temperature. Heat from fire and other heat sources only offer mild temporary relief. For a lasting effect, they must draw heat from the body of a human by touching him. When a Yuki-Onna touches a man, her soul synchronizes with his body and draws heat from it. Think Rouge from X-Men.
Note: People normally avoid Yuki-Onna for fear that she will steal all the warmth from their bodies. However, it is this curse that makes Yuki-Onna renowned for their power to sooth a fever. People sometimes seek her out for that very purpose. It is not only beneficial to a feverish person, but the Yuki-Onna also benefits greatly by draining all the excess heat from the person and taking it into themselves.
A man can withstand this feeding method for a few minutes before starting to feel the effect. The longer a Yuki-Onna holds onto a man, the colder he will become. This is why coupling with a Yuki-Onna in some good, excess heat producing sex is the best way for her to feed without harming a man. It still only buys a few hours, as the heat produced from the rigorous act of sex must be maintained. If the man's stamina is lacking, the Yuki-Onna may accidentally drain him of all his body heat.
Note: One human and Yuki-Onna couple found an easy way to enjoy the pleasures of the flesh without any worry of her draining him completely. A simple combination of hot soup mixed with a generous helping of brandy was all it took, followed soon after by the two stepping into a warm bath together. It made for a good indicator of his wife's intentions when the man would come home to find a bowl of soup and a bottle of spirits waiting for him. I guess you could call it their own special ritual of foreplay.
Some Yuki-Onna view their method of feeding as a curse and prefer to live high in the mountains where humans are not likely to come near. Many Yuki-Onna are gentle and kind, making their curse of stealing warmth with a simple touch very inconvenient when they fall in love with a human.
Keep in mind that not all Yuki-Onna are passive romantics. Some cannot control their lust for warmth and will always been on the lookout for a man to lure home with their power over snow. As sure as a fish on a hook, a man can easily be manipulated straight to the front door of a waiting Yuki-Onna.
There are two very important points to remember.
1: Resistance is futile
If you find yourself lost in a blinding snowstorm on a mountain, there is a good chance you've been found by a Yuki-Onna. Trying to navigate your way back home is not only difficult, it's also dangerous. You could walk right off a cliff and not even see it til it's too late. Your only safe option is to let the winds guide you until you arrive at her home. Only then will the blizzard subside.
2: You won't like her when she's angry
Once you have arrived at her home, leaving prematurely would be downright foolish. If you thought the blizzard that led you to her was bad, just wait til you see it when you try to leave. The snow and the Yuki-Onna are linked by emotions. Anger her by leaving, and you'll notice a ferocity in the storm that mirrors her emotions. Conversely, if she gets sad instead, the storm will die down to a silent snowfall of thick flakes. In any case, leaving a Yuki-Onna without first sharing your warmth is a big risk, and more often than not will result in you being led straight back to her.
So what are you supposed to do once you've crossed the threshold into one of these ice princess's homes? My advice is to make yourself comfortable and try to enjoy yourself. When dealing with a Yuki-Onna, the best resistance is no resistance. They are a kind and fair race of mamono, so you should be free to go once you've paid her your gift of warmth.
Yuki-Onna rate average on the danger scale. You have little to fear from her as long as you don't resist and give her what she wants. Who knows, you may even consider visiting her again sometime. And as you visit her more and more, you'll notice the snow that guides you to her will become softer, and perhaps even a bit warmer.
Ushi-Oni
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Ushi-Oni
You stumble upon a dark cavern while on a pleasant hiking trip into the mountains. You decide to check it out, curious as to what kind of wonders you might uncover within the bowels of the earth. You get in as far as the sunlight will reach and stop. You think you hear something breathing nearby. You squint your eyes and step into the darkness. The instant your feet step across the threshold into the darkness, a large claw covered in black fuzz grabs you by the arm and pulls you in.
And that, readers, is the recipe for “shit in your pants”.
The Ushi-Oni is a mamono quite literally unlike any other. When the demon lord changed all the monsters on the planet into Mamono, lusty women with monster-like features, she may not have put enough work into changing the Ushi-Oni. With an enormous lower body that resembles a wolf spider (one of the scariest spiders ever in my opinion) and an upper body belonging to an unsatisfiable, insatiable, and unstoppable big breasted woman, well, you be the judge as to whether she's a Mamono or a monster.
She's strong, so brute strength won't help you. She's fast, so even running away probably won't save you. And she's hungry for a lover, and that means you are on her menu. You ever heard the term “fucked the shit out of”? That's what will happen if she catches you. Ushi-Oni will rape and rape and rape some more without stopping or even slowing down. You will have to endure hours upon hours of brutal love making until you either pass out from exhaustion or your new mistress decides it's time for rest.
Note: Sometime even passing out won't stop an Ushi-Oni from violently raping their hubby.
If an Ushi-Oni finds a man she likes, she locks on to him like a heat guided missile. If that's you, I won't lie. You're in for a hard time, but you aren't doomed. Speed and strength won't help you much, but smarts will assist you greatly.
Note: It's not that Ushi-Oni are dumb by nature. They just have a one track mind that keeps them thinking about the same thing all the time. Sex. So you'll probably never see an Ushi-Oni competing on an episode of Jeopardy. Though it would be amusing to turn on the television and see a huge spider lady raping the contestants. “Sex Hungry Spiders of Zipangu” for $500 Alex.
Make no mistake. The Ushi-Oni is at the top of the Mamono danger scale. Evading her will be tough enough. Making her lose interest in you completely is the real challenge. That's why I'm here to give you a fighting chance. Read on and commit these defensive methods to memory, because it's not easy to read while being humped by a hungry spider.
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1: Hope you can swim
All arachnid type Mamono have one thing in common. They have absolutely zero swimming capabilities. Throw yourself into the nearest body of water while on the run from an Ushi-Oni and watch her reach for you hopelessly from the water's edge. There's just one small problem with this strategy. She might not be able to reach you in the water, but she can damn sure wait for you to get out. If you jumped into a small pond that can be easily surveyed from the shore, you're pretty much screwed. If you jumped into a large lake, you might be able to dive underwater and swim in a random direction to try and throw her off. Either way, jumping into a body of water will most likely prove to be a temporary solution.
Note: One man used this method and almost managed to throw a particularly tenacious Ushi-Oni off his trail. That was until his presence in the water caught the attention of a Kappa that happened to be swimming by. Overjoyed that a man had entered her water, she immediately latched on and tried to rape him. The man tried escaping to the shore, but the Ushi-Oni was there waiting for him with her clawed arms reaching out eagerly. Understandably frustrated with the situation, the man gave the Kappa a suggestion as to where she could stick her cucumber before succumbing to her advances.
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2: I got a new toy!
Ushi-Oni lust after men for two reasons. They need to feed on spirit energy, and they want a cock inside them. Surprisingly, the latter is actually more prominent in their minds than feeding. Ushi-Oni are starved for the sensation of a long phallic object being inserted into their insatiable pussies. So why not give them that in the form of a toy? A rubber dong can give an Ushi-Oni just as much pleasure as a real one. (Unless of course yours is bigger, but lets face it. That's not true at all is it? Didn't think so.)
The only issue with offering a toy to an Ushi-Oni is teaching her how to use it. They are conditioned to want a man inside them, so getting them interested in a fake penis can prove to be a challenge. As they say, experience is the best instructor. Just pull the old switcheroo when she tries to mount you and watch her face melt with pleasure. Now you have two options. Stay and give her a good time at your leisure, or flee and hope she figures out how to do it herself.
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Ushi-Oni rank in the top three most dangerous Mamono. They are notorious for never releasing a man once they have one in their grasp and raping him for the rest of his life from within the comfort of her cave. This is why Ushi-Oni are rarely seen outside of their homes in the mountains.
Use your head and don't purchase that quaint little cottage at the bottom of the mountain. Because you'll be in for one helluva surprise when your first guest turns out to be an Ushi-Oni on the hunt for a hubby.
Grizzly
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Grizzly
She may not be smarter than the average bear, but she certainly is hornier. It's the grizzly. A beastly monster with one helluva bear hug. Have you ever heard the saying “It's the quiet ones you gotta watch.” It's true. The sheer strength and speed of a grizzly rivals even that of an ushi-oni. Don't let her normally dopey expression and calm demeanor fool you. This is one mamono you do not want to tango with.
As is well known, the one thing that can set a grizzly off is the sweet tang of alraune nectar processed by honeybees. Honey. They can't get enough of it. So the first step towards avoiding these feral creatures is to first avoid the source of their adoration. Alraune and honeybees.
Note: One man believed that he could make a living by becoming a honey thief. Honeybees are docile mamono, so he had little to fear from their stingers as he sneaked in under cover of night and made away with over two gallons of expensive honey. Unfortunately, the forest at night is not exactly an easy place to trek. He eventually stumbled and spilled one of the jugs all over his groin. And that was when he awoke a grizzly that was sleeping in the tree above him.
When the unconscious man was discovered in the morning by local villagers, his pants were torn to shreds and his penis was sore from it being licked so fiercely (among other things...) Naturally, the other jug of honey was being enjoyed by the happily grunting grizzly that had returned to her spot in the tree just above him.
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As mentioned earlier, grizzlies are among the strongest mamono. If they were active man seekers, they would pose a serious threat to any forest goers. Thankfully, they tend to stick to themselves and just live life to the fullest. That is, until the taste or smell of honey sends them on a quest to find a hump buddy.
Allow me to put this succinctly. If a grizzly wants you, she will have you. Once she gets you into that signature bear hug, there's no coming out. Just as actual bears are tenacious and strong as hell, so are grizzlies. However, while strength won't help you to escape them, knowing how to get into their heads will. They are simple minded mamono, making them easy foes for those with the proper information.
Well, that information is what you're here for isn't it? So lets get started.
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1: Calm your shit.
This is mainly a don't instead of a do. Say you have encountered a grizzly and she's all hopped up on honey. She rarin for some sex and you're the only person around that can fulfill that desire. You're first instinct will likely be to run, right?
But here's the problem. If you run, it just makes her want you even more. Most animals get excited when they see something running away from them. It makes them want to chase. This is also true for a grizzly, with one extra effect. It excites them sexually. Not only will they chase after you with intense vigor, but the raping you shall receive upon capture will be ten fold. Give or take...
And yes. She will catch you.
In the event that you encounter a grizzly, ignore your primal instinct to flee and remain perfectly calm. Though don't be so calm that you lay down on the ground. That would just be inviting her to come violate you.
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2: Come fly. Bother me.
It is not uncommon to spot grizzlies “attacking” alraune and honeybees. What appears to be a sexual act is actually just foraging for food. A grizzly's tongue is long and slender, making it easy for them to get the nectar and honey out of otherwise...ahem...hard to reach places...
Just as a grizzly will attack alraune and honeybees, there is another mamono that behaves in the same manner with a grizzly. That is the beelzebub. Beelzebub adore the sweet taste of honey just as much as grizzlies. Because a grizzly's right paw tends to remain soaked in the stuff, these fly type mamono are drawn to them. You might say that beelzebub are the natural enemies of grizzlies.
If you are fortunate to have a tamed beelzebub that is loyal to you, this will offer some resemblance of protection against a grizzly attack. Because they are a dopey mamono, grizzly's tend to be fearful of beelzebub and try to flee. And while she is busy trying to detach the licking fly from her paw, you will have an opportunity to escape to a safe distance.
Note: Of course, you'll then have to deal with a beelzebub that is horny from honey once she returns home.
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3: Attack its weak point for massive damage!
You might take one look at a grizzly's claws and automatically assume that the best course of action would be to steer clear of them. That is understandable, but it's also going back to instinctual behavior of humans. I challenge you to ignore that instinct once again and heed my words. The weak point of a grizzly is the space between her claws.
Contrary to popular belief, grizzly's do not slice and dice with their claws. On the rare occasions that they have to attack or defend themselves, they tend to swing their large paws like boxing gloves. In truth, their claws are really only used for soothing an annoying itch.
If you are under attack by a grizzly, try to get your fingers into the soft and furry spaces between her claws. If she suddenly opens her mouth and makes a stressed growling sound, you hit the spot. Keep massaging and petting that space and she will continue to become more and more docile until she is practically laying at your feet. Note that it doesn't hurt the creature. They just don't know how to deal with having their sensitive spots found.
Once she is docile as a newborn kitten, you are free to do with her as you will. You could leave her there and go about your business, or you could stick around and have some fun. It's very likely that she will do whatever you want at this point.
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Grizzly's can be fearsome mamono or docile teddy bears. In spite of their incredible strength, there are relatively easy to deal with by using the methods above. Because of this, they rate low on the danger scale for somebody who is properly informed. However, without the knowledge of how to deal with them, they rate extremely high. It's brains against brawn when encountering this type of mamono.
You have to be smarter than the average grizzly.
Gargoyle
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Gargoyle
Harmless during the day, but come nighttime, they become one of the most tenacious and stealthy mamono in existence. The gargoyle is a rare breed that is rarely seen anywhere but towers and old castles. Should you spot one in an area that is far from either of these, for lack of a better word, breeding areas, consider yourself either very lucky or very unfortunate.
While golems are strictly man-made mamono, gargoyles are strange natural occurrences that defy the laws of reality. Speculation is that when a gargoyle remains on a pedestal for long enough, her essence will leave an imprint within the stone. That essence will then travel through the stone to another vacant spot and start a truly miraculous metamorphosis. Over the course of at least three years, a mirror image of the original gargoyle will steadily grow from the rock. However, the new gargoyle will remain lifeless until the same spell that gave sentience to the original is applied to her. It is believed that the demon lord herself applies this spell.
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Note: In one of the extremely rare occasions of an actual demon lord sighting, an explorer was examining the outside of a decrepit castle when he caught sight of a woman up in one of the spires. He looked closer and saw that it was a woman with incredibly large demon wings and pale skin. She was tracing her finger on the thigh and arm of a soon to be living gargoyle.
She caught sight and of the man and grinned just as she applied the finishing touch to the statue's cheek. The explorer wasn't aware of the danger he was in and stayed just as the sun disappeared behind the ridge. As soon as the shadows touched the stone pedestal, the gargoyle awoke and immediately swooped down onto the appropriately surprised man. The demon lord watched for a moment before leaving behind her newly created child to have her fun.
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Because the entire gargoyle race is expanded in this manner, all gargoyles are completely identical to the original that was created by the demon lord.
For being such a rare breed, one would think that being prepared for an encounter with one would be a waste of time. But then, isn't it better to have a condom and not need it than need it and not have one? I rest my case. Gargoyles tend to hide in the shadows of night and swoop down on their prey at the opportune time. Usually when he stops to rest or is distracted by something. While the body of an awakened gargoyle may be soft, they still carry the impressive weight of the rock that they were born from. If she mounts you, there really isn't much that you can do unless you can bench press about three hundred pounds.
Don't worry though. Gargoyle's are excellent at controlling their weight so they don't crush their prey. So at least there's that...
However, no mamono is without her weaknesses and quirks. The gargoyle may seem as immovable and indomitable as a rock, but she is actually quite easy to deal with if you know what to do in such a situation.
So what do you say we get to it then?
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1: What was THAT noise?!
Gargoyles are known for their swift and stealthy flying. They can stalk men for hours without being noticed by sticking to the shade of night. However, they do have one serious flaw that often alerts men to their presence. The golden chain that binds their wrists together.
Because gargoyle's hands are more like claws and incapable of gripping, they are forced to keep steady tension in the chain while stalking to keep it from making any sound. Sometimes though, they mess up and allow their arms to go slack for a brief moment, giving the chain a chance to make a very distinct clanking that is characteristic of gold. Some men have heard this clanking and ignored it, but others have been wise enough to run upon hearing this tell-tale sign of a stalking gargoyle.
Because gargoyles are so heavy, they have difficulty at controlling their flight when trying to capture a moving target. Note that if you catch the sound of a gargoyle's chain and start to run, never run in a straight line. Keep changing your direction and they will never be able to touch you.
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Note: One man used this method against a particularly tenacious gargoyle and actually managed to get her to wipe out after taking a sharp turn. She took out about five trees before finally coming to a stop in a stream. The man was reported as saying “It was really quite impressive.”
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2: Human used splash. It's super effective!!
You probably expected this one. Yes, gargoyles are extremely sensitive to water. How couldn't they be? They spend half of their existence as rocks!
If you splash water on a gargoyle BEFORE she mounts you for sex, it will overwhelm her senses and send her into a state of euphoric ecstasy. Just as with a grizzly or a ghoul, this will leave you free to have your way with her as you wish. Being held against your will by a mamono may not sound appealing, but there's nothing wrong with willingly giving them what they want on your own terms.
Note: It is vital that you do not douse a gargoyle with water after she has begun mating with you. If you do, she will lose her ability to control her own weight and will inevitably crush you until her body dries and she regains her composure. Believe me. You don't want three hundred pounds of gargoyle sitting on your goods for any amount of time.
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3: Hacking the demon lord's spell.
Did you know that the spell that gives sentience to golems is actually an altered version of the spell that does the same for gargoyles? Just look at the red eyes of the two and you'll see a startling similarity. The original spell was altered so that golems would be obedient to their creators and not instantly try to jump their bones as a gargoyle would.
Sadly, you cannot control a gargoyle by simply erasing the runic spells on her body. Mainly because those spells were put there by the demon lord's powerful magic. They won't come off with a bottle of Windex and a rag, so you have to be a little more clever than that and try to hijack the original spell with a new one. The good news is that if a gargoyle mounts you, you have until daybreak to experiment. The bad news is that a knowledge of runic spells is required for this to work. If you try just randomly drawing markings onto her runes, you run the risk of triggering her transformation back into stone. Permanently. And that would be very bad for you.
Because spending years to learn the runic alphabet is very impractical as a mere line of defense, I suggest you seek out a golem and memorize the markings on her arm. If you apply these markings directly over-top of the markings on a gargoyle, there is a chance that it will override the original spell and cause her to take on the mentality of a golem. Which is to collect your semen until she is full and then return to her master. I suggest you try pricking your finger and using your blood to make the markings. If that's no good, well...you could also try using your own spunk. Biological material may have a better chance of overriding the spell. Keep in mind that even if you manage to override the original spell, it will constantly conflict with the new one and may cause unexpected behavior.
Note: One man used the easier method of hacking a gargoyle's runes when he was under attack by one. Luckily for him, he had been attacked by a golem just a month ago and had taken the opportunity to memorize the runes on her arm. He applied them using his own blood and was surprised that it actually worked. The two continued to mate for a short time after that until the gargoyle dismounted him and left with a blank look on her face.
The sorceress that owned the golem was in for a surprise when the gargoyle broke into her home and delivered a load of sperm onto her floor before going out to collect more. The sorceress cursed under her breath as she reached for a mop and bucket.
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Compared to some of the other stealthy mamono like ghouls or werecats, gargoyles are a great deal more manageable. However, even with the proper knowledge on how to defend from them, there is no guarantee that you will be lucky. You may not hear her chain or it may not make any noise. There may not be a water source nearby for you to splash on her. And if you have no knowledge of runic symbols or no memory of a golem's markings, then you simply can't resort to trying to rewire her.
Because of this uncertainty, gargoyles rate high on the mamono danger scale. They aren't the type to let their mates go once they've captured one. However, being captured by a gargoyle does come with a benefit. While you are petrified during the daytime, your body is placed in a state of suspended animation. Meaning that you will cease to age at all during that time. This effectively doubles your life span.
Studies are being done to try and replicate this petrifying effect, but thus far, the only means of doing so is by throwing yourself into the arms of a gargoyle. If the notion appeals to you, feel free. Just know that there's nothing you can do about bird droppings while you're petrified.
Wyvern
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Wyvern
Nothing can challenge a dragoon as they soar through the skies. Save for their own mounts of course. Wyverns are the abrasive and less behaved cousins of dragons. Unlike the more calm and honorable dragon, wyverns flail through the skies like lightning bolts and swoop down on unsuspecting men at a moment’s notice. Their hearts are like hurricanes, never silent and always moving. With that in mind, they are an extremely challenging race to tame even for those that are destined to be their partners, the dragoons. Training a wyvern is like really good sex. It’s hard, it takes a long time, but the end results are supremely satisfying.
So if a dragoon has a difficult time managing this more agile and mobile race of dragon, how could you, a normal human, ever hope to stand a chance? Do you go Dragon Quest on their ass and cast crackle to deal heavy ice damage? Do you pull some Reign of Fire and bring her down with cunning strategy, an axe, and a cleanly shaven scalp?
Do you use MLP logic and tempt her with some tasty gemstones?
Note: Neither dragons nor wyverns eat gemstones. Put that out of your head.
After interviewing some experienced dragoons on the subject, I have compiled a couple effective means of avoiding these swift sky serpents. If you have no desire to become the mount of an overzealous wyvern, read on.
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1: Don’t run until you stun
If you run from a wyvern that has locked on to you, you will simply be tired when she violates you. Wyverns are faster and more agile than any human alive, and with their sharp eyes, they can see and react to every move you make. She’ll know you’re going to make a right before you do.
What’s the solution to this issue? Cast thunder wave to paralyze her and run to the hills. If you don’t happen to know thunder wave, you’ll have to resort to throwing something in her way. A cloud of dust or sand will blind her. A handful of small rocks will force her to change her trajectory, as the scales of a wyvern are not as strong as a dragon’s and are susceptible to cracking. If you can keep a steady rhythm of disturbing her flight patterns by throwing things, you can earn enough time to employ method 2 below.
Note: A candy maker had the misfortune of running into a wyvern on his way to another town. Instead of throwing rocks or sand to protect him, he reached into his bag and threw jelly beans into the air in an effort to distract her. When one of the beans fell into the wyvern’s mouth, she actually stopped when she realized it was sweet and left the candy maker alone to collect the rest that had fallen. Unfortunately, she arrived in the candy maker’s shop a day later with an eager face and open mouth. It would seem that while dragons are strictly carnivorous, wyverns have quite the sweet tooth.
2: Come on in. Kick off your shoes.
Wyverns own the open air, but inside, they are limited to what they can do on their feet, which honestly, isn’t very impressive. When forced to walk around on their legs, they move like chickens with their arms pressed to their sides. Kind of like a Yian Kut-Ku from Monster Hunter. Well, maybe a bad example, as those are still dangerous on their feet. A wyvern however, is not. If you can make your way inside a building, they will still attempt to follow you on their legs if they have no other choice. At this point, they are much more manageable. Just get yourself behind a locked door and eventually they will leave. They might leave the inside of the building a mess before departing, but you’ll have your freedom at least.
Note: One man was able to escape a wyvern into an old cathedral that he thought was abandoned. As the wyvern scratched against the locked wooden door, it alerted the two gargoyles that had taken up residence inside the building to his presence. His problems then became two-fold as his focus shifted from not becoming the mount to a wyvern, to not becoming the pedestal for a pair of gargoyles.
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Wyverns may not be as cocky or prideful as dragons, but they certainly are more tenacious. It agitates them when they can’t get at their desired prey, causing them to pursue ever more fiercely. Remember that you aren’t dealing with something that is going to try to outsmart you or try negotiating. You’re dealing with something much like a zombie, something that is going to be on you like white on a holstaurus until you give her no other choice but to retire. They are a very dangerous breed and you should always be wary of their existence in mountainous areas. In more ways than one, (just ask any dragoon) wyverns will exhaust the hell out of you.
Amazoness
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Amazoness
You thought the hood was dangerous? Try spending one night in the Amazon. If you manage to survive, you will have the proper respect for the name “Amazon”
Note: I’m not talking about the online store. City folk…
Rightly so, you should also have the same respect for the only mamono that is tough enough to have earned the name of one of the most inhospitable and dangerous places on earth. The amazoness.
An amazoness has the skill and strength to punch a hole in both your face and your ego at age 10. Imagine what a mature one could do to you. Fortunately for you, a mature amazoness has no desire to kill you. What they desire from you is total obedience, respect, and sex. In public. With everybody watching…
It’s a lot like a prison relationship. You’re the nerdy guy with glasses that was incarcerated for cyber crimes, and she is the big burly dude in a wife beater and a shiv on hand at all time. In order to keep this big mutha fucka from killing yo ass and earning his protection, you simply don’t protest when you bend over to pick up the soap.
A disturbing image I know. But to an amazoness, you are her bitch. You cook, clean, and are available for sex at all times. You are the one hiding in a corner when that cocky village of orcs comes to rob your home, and she’s the one with a sword in her hand. You don’t even have to watch your own amazoness children. They watch you.
The fact that they are a breed of succubus doesn’t help matters. While they almost never use them, they still have the same arsenal of tools that all succubi possess for enchanting men. Combine that with her mastery of combat, and you’ve got a mamono that is as tenacious as a cockroach and damn difficult to deal with.
But I didn’t say it was impossible…
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1: It’s time to d-d-d-d-d-d-duel!
An amazoness’ greatest weakness is her sense of pride. You can struggle and try to fight her off when she comes to claim you, but you’ll never have a chance of overcoming her strength and skill. What you have to do is issue a formal challenge to her. Simply saying “I challenge you to a duel” and she will stop in her tracks. In that moment, you must specify that you will require one day to prepare. Remember that amazoness’ are well aware of their strength and are also aware that there are very few men that could pose a challenge for them. Hence, it is extremely likely that she will accept your challenge and give you a day to prepare. This of course, gives you time to relocate to another continent. Because let’s face it. Unless you’re Mike Tyson, you wouldn’t have a chance in an actual duel.
Note: One man thought he had moved a sufficient distance from his old home when he challenged an amazoness to a duel. Unfortunately, not only had he challenged the most prideful of the village, but she was also the village chieftain. Realizing she had been duped, she actually traveled for years on foot until she finally tracked down her target. Needless to say, she whupped him good before dragging him back to her village.
2: Hey, I just met you. And this is crazy. But here’s my number. Hey, where you going baby?
Amazoness’ make the choices. They decide when to find a man. Not the other way around. Therefore, if you suspect that you have become the target of an amazoness or are being chased by one, there’s an easy method of tricking her mind into leaving you alone. Once again, you must use her overblown sense of pride against her. If you attempt to court an amazoness of your own will, 9/10 she will turn away in disgust and leave you be. This is because if she were to continue her advances claim you when you have made it apparent that you want her, her brain will tell her that she can’t give you what you want. Like I said, an amazoness makes the choices. Not you.
Note: There are some succubi that consider themselves quite the tricksters. There have been reports of succubi taking on the image of a tan amazoness with the intention of tricking men into using the method above. When a man willingly accepts a succubus’ invitation into a relationship, dark magic bounds them together and makes it impossible for the man to ever truly be rid of her. There is currently only one way to know if an amazoness is a succubus in disguise, and that is by observing her mannerisms. An amazoness is generally stoic and will normally not speak to a man unless they have been together for an extended period of time. Also, they carry themselves as warriors. Never swaying their hips or trying to appear appealing. Should you see an amazoness saying how sexy she thinks you are while showing off her ass, you’ve got a full blown succubus on your hands. Refer to the succubus section of the Mamono Survival Guide for info on how to deal with her.
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Amazoness’ are deadly for their strength, speed, and skill. But their most dangerous trait is their tenacity. Like a lamia with a cheating swine of a husband, an amazoness will follow you to the ends of the earth if she can. Hell, one would probably build a shuttle craft if she discovered that you had moved to the moon. Never underestimate these female warriors. They will dominate you in five seconds flat.
There. I knew I could do it without making a Futurama reference.
Lilim
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Lilim
She is the most infamous and irresistible of all the breeds of succubus. She invokes hurricanes of lust in men simply by her natural beauty. She is the Super Saiyan 4 of mamono, surpassed only by the demon lord in terms of power and beauty. She is the Lord Voldemort, Super Sonic, Metal Mario, and Ultimate Cheeseburger of all monsters. She is the undeniable Lilim.
Think I’m exaggerating? I’m not. Lilim are the daughters of the demon lord herself, and being the offspring of the woman who single handedly transformed all of the world’s monsters into what we know today as mamono pretty much makes you a badass. Or in this case, a bad (Michael Jackson) ass.
You need to understand that Lilim are the kryptonite of all humans. Men of perfectly sound minds cannot resist the look of them, and neither can women for that matter. As they are daughters of the demon lord, their bodies are molded to 100% perfection. Even down to the sub-atomic level, you will not find a single imperfection in a Lilim. And when you look upon something that doesn’t have a single flaw in her body, you tend to get a little awe-struck.
To make matters more trying, Lilim are blessed with the magical prowess of the demon lord herself. So that you may understand the severity of what you are facing, let’s take a moment to go through the powers at her disposal.
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1: Arresting Beauty
It would be futile for me to try and express just how perfect Lilim are in an effort to prepare you, because it simply would not matter. Humans go through life without ever witnessing true perfection. We are conditioned from birth to accept imperfections as the standard of living. When a human looks upon a Lilim, the brain goes into sensory overload and causes a paralyzing effect that makes it very difficult to even turn your eyes away. Wearing polarizing lenses would do nothing to prevent this, as the paralysis is causes by her natural beauty and is not the work of magic or hypnotism. Put simply, Lilim have the power of Medusa in their entire bodies.
2: Power of Suggestion
The power of suggestion is the ability to influence others by guiding their thoughts, feelings, or behavior through two means. The psychological method that suggests through talking to a receptive recipient, and hypnosis. Needless to say, Lilim prefer hypnosis. The human brain becomes very susceptible to hypnosis after being stunned, making it very easy for Lilim to slip inside your head. Note that she cannot control your actions. She can simply “suggest” them. It is possible that some brains can resist the insistent whispers of a Lilim within their minds.
3: Aura
The blood of a Lilim is actually not blood, but the fluid that makes up a dark matter’s anatomy. Thanks to this, not only are Lilim able to transform men into incubi, like any other succubus, but they can also easily transform women into mamono. This aura’s area of effect is very small, thanks to a Lilim’s chaos imbued body. However, it will begin to affect men and women when physical contact is made. Lilim can also control the intensity of the aura, allowing them to fill more than one person at a time with dark energy.
4: Familiars
While uncommon, some Lilim refer to wait in a protected area and let familiars hunt men for them. They have control over all demonic breeds of mamono, but their preferred choice is the arch imp, mainly for their effectiveness of carrying out their duties.
Note: It has been speculated by some that they actually choose arch imps for their cuteness.
5: Temporal Fields
Due to the great amount of spirit energy required, only 5% of the succubus race has the ability to create a temporal field. That 5% of course, is the Lilim. A temporal field is an area that has been phased out of our plane of existence. When a Lilim creates a field, both she and her mate are made completely undetectable by outside sources, eliminating the worry of any interference. Because of the demonic nature of Lilim, the plane of existence they normally choose is hell. A temporal field requires a constant flow of energy to maintain, so Lilim will generally only create one as a situational solution. A field will dissipate when the flow of energy has ceased.
Note: Some Lilim become so smitten with their partners that they become addicted to mating with them. Should this happen inside of a temporal field, it’s likely that the two will remain there for eternity until enough energy has been gathered to create a new plane of existence entirely, in which the man and Lilim will be gods. This can take up to a millennium to accomplish, but since the man will be kept alive and pacified by both the Lilim’s magic and incredible sex, it isn’t an unpleasant fate.
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These powers make Lilim the top ranked dangerous mamono. Humans simply are unable to withstand their allure. Top it off with the fact that Lilim are indiscriminate by nature, and there is not one person on the planet that is not safe from their embrace. They also have the human trait of varying personalities, making them unpredictable by disposition.
So with so much going against you, how could you ever hope to avoid these daughters of the demon lord? There is a way, and ONLY one way. It may go against your morals and it may not make sense considering the point behind this guide, but it truly is the only guaranteed way to keep a Lilim from making you her prince.
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“Sorry, but my heart belongs to another.”
If you are already in a relationship with a mamono (married is preferable), a Lilim will grant you her blessing upon meeting you and move on. The mission of the demon lord, and in turn the Lilim, has always been to bring men and monster together in harmony. If a Lilim sees that you are truly in love with a mamono, she will bless you with a special spell that will ensure that even in death, you and your beloved will never be torn apart. It is the purest and most sincere form of magic. One that is only cast upon couples that deeply, and naturally love each other.
Note: Keep in mind that trying to fake a relationship will only anger a Lilim, likely causing her to transform you into an incubus on the spot.
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And there you have it. While this method may seem in direct contradiction to this guide, remember that mamono are not an evil scourge that was put on the planet to rape humans to death. A great deal of them can be tender and adoring life partners. The point of this guide is to give you the chance to make your own decisions, and when you are ready, you can accept the gift of mamono. However, should you ever find yourself unable to defend from the advances of an alraune, succubus, or even Lilim, perhaps it was just your fate to be their life partner. Give them a chance, and you may even be grateful for the day you were forced into their arms.
Slime
Spoiler: show
The Mamono Survival Guide
By: Helios Leinheart
Slime
I expressed in the Alraune entry that I would never suggest a defensive method that would wound or irreversibly harm a mamono. For this entry, I don’t have to enforce that policy. Because it would matter if you were packing a double barreled shotgun with napalm shells and a chainsaw bayonet attached. A slime will approach you regardless and pin you down even while your chainsaw spins uselessly inside her body. When dealing with a slime, you are dealing with something that cannot be stopped. Only impeded or avoided.
The composition of a slime’s body is truly remarkable. Unlike dark slimes, whose bodies are made of jellied chaos with a core as the brain, a slime’s body is made up entirely of water. What gives a slime sentience and its gel-like body is the extraordinary mass of microorganisms that have bonded with the water on the molecular lever. These microorganisms are actually a lesser known creation of the demon lord, which we will refer to as Aphrodite for simplicity.
Note: It has been speculated that Aphrodite was originally intended to be a behavior altering disease that is transferred through direct fluidic contact (sex). The disease would have taken root in the brain and would have altered a human’s disposition to mamono. Someone who hated them would slowly come around and seek to be with one. Needless to say, but this original plan failed. As to how Aphrodite reinvented itself to create indestructible gelatin girl remains unknown.
Aphrodite acts as one mind, creating the illusion that a slime actually possess a single mind. In spite of the fact that there are billions of Aphrodite inside a single slime, she still remains fairly dumb. To be honest, slimes aren’t even smart enough to remove a man’s pants before mating. Slimes have a one-track mind. Feed and reproduce. And since Aphrodite feeds on male semen, it is clear how they will accomplish these two goals.
Note: It is a common misconception that slimes have sticky bodies. This is not true, as neither water nor Aphrodite have any adhesive properties. However, the body of a slime is still adept at cling onto a man and never letting go. How they accomplish this is once again thanks to Aphrodite. The microorganisms bunch together and create tiny suction cups that boast impressive gripping power. The cups are too small and numerous to be noticed by a man, giving the illusion of stickiness.
Facing something that is essentially indestructible may seem like a daunting task, but it’s actually not that hard when you know what to do. A slime has two easily exploitable weaknesses. Her simple mind and her watery body.
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1: Just when you thought it was safe to enter the water
The mass of a slime’s body only goes as far as the mass of Aphrodite within her. If there isn’t enough Aphrodite, then she will get, for lack of a better word, waterlogged. Should you douse a slime or lead her into a body of water, she will be immobilized for a brief time as the Aphrodite within her regroups. She will eventually be able to pull herself out of a pool, but you should easily have enough time to get away before she does.
Note: Slimes do not reproduce until their Aphrodite has reached critical mass, which is precisely the same mass as the slime multiplied by two. Meaning that a slime that travels from man to man will have a larger than normal amount of the microorganisms inside her. This means that it could sometimes take more than a bucket of water to stop a slime. For example, if a slime was just a couple thousand Aphrodite away from reaching critical mass and reproducing, she could potentially increase to twice her size without being immobilized by added water.
2: Stay lubed
Slimes cannot grip a man’s skin if it is lubricated. However, they can grip onto clothing. Because of this, wear shorts and a t-shirt with generous amounts of lotion or sunscreen on your arms and legs. Slimes may be slow, but they are notoriously silent and can easily sneak up on an unsuspecting male. Stay lubed up for these occasions.
3. Pikachu! Use thundershock!
Electricity is an extremely effective method of stopping a slime in its slimy tracks. Because their bodies easily conduct electricity, the Aphrodite within them all becomes affected at the same time. A minor shock will stun and confuse a slime for about ten seconds. A taser shock will stun one for about a minute. I can’t even speculate what would happen were one to be struck by a lightning bolt.
Note: Fire is the worst thing you could ever try using on a slime. Not only will it do nothing to slow it down, but it will actually speed her up. Fire evaporates water, causing the mass of a slime to decrease. However, this does nothing to decrease the level of Aphrodite in her body, meaning that the slime would actually become faster. It also means that if a slime’s body were to decrease by half, she would automatically reproduce. Then you have two fast moving foes to worry about. In short, thundershock good, flamethrower bad.
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Slimes are dumb, slow, and not particularly tenacious. This makes them very low on the mamono danger scale. Their greatest advantage is their ability to stealthily sneak up on a resting male and attack, but even then you don’t have much to worry about. Slimes may be dumb, but they aren’t cruel. They understand when a man has had enough and will leave him be once finished feeding. However, if you enjoy her company and would like her to stay with you, all you would have to do is block her path when she turns to leave. Slimes can either be a nuisance on your day or a good friend. Just be sure to clean up the mess she leaves.
By: Helios Leinheart
Slime
I expressed in the Alraune entry that I would never suggest a defensive method that would wound or irreversibly harm a mamono. For this entry, I don’t have to enforce that policy. Because it would matter if you were packing a double barreled shotgun with napalm shells and a chainsaw bayonet attached. A slime will approach you regardless and pin you down even while your chainsaw spins uselessly inside her body. When dealing with a slime, you are dealing with something that cannot be stopped. Only impeded or avoided.
The composition of a slime’s body is truly remarkable. Unlike dark slimes, whose bodies are made of jellied chaos with a core as the brain, a slime’s body is made up entirely of water. What gives a slime sentience and its gel-like body is the extraordinary mass of microorganisms that have bonded with the water on the molecular lever. These microorganisms are actually a lesser known creation of the demon lord, which we will refer to as Aphrodite for simplicity.
Note: It has been speculated that Aphrodite was originally intended to be a behavior altering disease that is transferred through direct fluidic contact (sex). The disease would have taken root in the brain and would have altered a human’s disposition to mamono. Someone who hated them would slowly come around and seek to be with one. Needless to say, but this original plan failed. As to how Aphrodite reinvented itself to create indestructible gelatin girl remains unknown.
Aphrodite acts as one mind, creating the illusion that a slime actually possess a single mind. In spite of the fact that there are billions of Aphrodite inside a single slime, she still remains fairly dumb. To be honest, slimes aren’t even smart enough to remove a man’s pants before mating. Slimes have a one-track mind. Feed and reproduce. And since Aphrodite feeds on male semen, it is clear how they will accomplish these two goals.
Note: It is a common misconception that slimes have sticky bodies. This is not true, as neither water nor Aphrodite have any adhesive properties. However, the body of a slime is still adept at cling onto a man and never letting go. How they accomplish this is once again thanks to Aphrodite. The microorganisms bunch together and create tiny suction cups that boast impressive gripping power. The cups are too small and numerous to be noticed by a man, giving the illusion of stickiness.
Facing something that is essentially indestructible may seem like a daunting task, but it’s actually not that hard when you know what to do. A slime has two easily exploitable weaknesses. Her simple mind and her watery body.
---
1: Just when you thought it was safe to enter the water
The mass of a slime’s body only goes as far as the mass of Aphrodite within her. If there isn’t enough Aphrodite, then she will get, for lack of a better word, waterlogged. Should you douse a slime or lead her into a body of water, she will be immobilized for a brief time as the Aphrodite within her regroups. She will eventually be able to pull herself out of a pool, but you should easily have enough time to get away before she does.
Note: Slimes do not reproduce until their Aphrodite has reached critical mass, which is precisely the same mass as the slime multiplied by two. Meaning that a slime that travels from man to man will have a larger than normal amount of the microorganisms inside her. This means that it could sometimes take more than a bucket of water to stop a slime. For example, if a slime was just a couple thousand Aphrodite away from reaching critical mass and reproducing, she could potentially increase to twice her size without being immobilized by added water.
2: Stay lubed
Slimes cannot grip a man’s skin if it is lubricated. However, they can grip onto clothing. Because of this, wear shorts and a t-shirt with generous amounts of lotion or sunscreen on your arms and legs. Slimes may be slow, but they are notoriously silent and can easily sneak up on an unsuspecting male. Stay lubed up for these occasions.
3. Pikachu! Use thundershock!
Electricity is an extremely effective method of stopping a slime in its slimy tracks. Because their bodies easily conduct electricity, the Aphrodite within them all becomes affected at the same time. A minor shock will stun and confuse a slime for about ten seconds. A taser shock will stun one for about a minute. I can’t even speculate what would happen were one to be struck by a lightning bolt.
Note: Fire is the worst thing you could ever try using on a slime. Not only will it do nothing to slow it down, but it will actually speed her up. Fire evaporates water, causing the mass of a slime to decrease. However, this does nothing to decrease the level of Aphrodite in her body, meaning that the slime would actually become faster. It also means that if a slime’s body were to decrease by half, she would automatically reproduce. Then you have two fast moving foes to worry about. In short, thundershock good, flamethrower bad.
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Slimes are dumb, slow, and not particularly tenacious. This makes them very low on the mamono danger scale. Their greatest advantage is their ability to stealthily sneak up on a resting male and attack, but even then you don’t have much to worry about. Slimes may be dumb, but they aren’t cruel. They understand when a man has had enough and will leave him be once finished feeding. However, if you enjoy her company and would like her to stay with you, all you would have to do is block her path when she turns to leave. Slimes can either be a nuisance on your day or a good friend. Just be sure to clean up the mess she leaves.
Thank you thank you thank you! 
